Let’s be real for a second, girls notice everything. And I mean everything. That nervous chuckle? That over-the-top flex? The way you check your phone every two seconds? Yep, they see it all. And if you’re unknowingly giving off insecure vibes, it could be killing your chances before you even say “hey.”
But don’t worry, my dude. I got you. Let’s break down six things you’re doing that scream insecurity, and most importantly, how to fix them!
1. Trying Too Hard to Impress Her
You think she’ll like you more if you name-drop celebrities, talk about how much money you’ll make one day, or flex in every photo? Hate to break it to you, but she’s probably rolling her eyes internally.
What to do instead: Confidence is quiet. Let your actions and personality speak for themselves. Be genuinely interesting rather than desperately trying to look cool.
2. Over-Apologizing for Everything
“Sorry for texting.” “Sorry for taking up your time.” “Sorry for breathing near you.” Bro. Stop.
Constantly apologizing makes it seem like you don’t think you deserve her attention. And that’s not the energy we want.
What to do instead: Apologize only when necessary, like if you actually mess up. Otherwise, own your space and speak with confidence.
3. Always Seeking Validation
If you keep fishing for compliments like, “Do you think I look good in this?” or “Did you like that joke I made?”, it’s a dead giveaway that you’re not feeling yourself.
What to do instead: Work on self-validation. If you like your outfit, wear it. If you think your joke is funny, own it. Confidence isn’t asking for approval, it’s deciding you’re already enough.
4. Acting Like You Don’t Care (When You Obviously Do)
Playing it too cool, ignoring her texts, pretending you’re too busy, acting uninterested, makes you look not mysterious, but insecure. If you like her, it’s okay to show it.
What to do instead: Be direct and authentic. If you want to talk to her, text her. If you think she looks good, tell her. Confidence is about owning your feelings, not hiding them.
5. Comparing Yourself to Other Guys
If you constantly bring up how much better some other guy is, whether it’s about looks, money, or social status, you’re literally putting yourself down in front of her.
What to do instead: Focus on what makes you unique. No one else can be you, and that’s your superpower. Instead of worrying about other guys, work on being the best version of yourself.
6. Being Afraid to Make Decisions
“I don’t know, what do you want to do?” a hundred times in a row. It’s nice to be considerate, but if you never take the lead, it makes you look uncertain and insecure.
What to do instead: Take initiative. Suggest a place to go, pick a movie, make a plan. Even if she has a different opinion, she’ll appreciate that you actually made a choice.
Final Thoughts
Look, confidence isn’t about being perfect, it’s about being comfortable with yourself. Girls aren’t expecting you to be a movie star; they just want to see that you believe in yourself.